Small Steps:
Today I want to talk about the Small Steps Technique, which I have found empowering in dealing with the ADHD symptoms of depression, anxiety and procrastination.
What is it:
Small steps are usually used as a motivational or goal-achievement tool. It breaks your goals or tasks down into little chunks to make them feel less over-facing and more achievable. It is a technique that I have adapted as an ADHD sufferer to help address depression, anxiety and procrastination. Let me explain how I have learned to use it in each of the three situations.
Depression - When you are depressed, you feel frozen and can't do anything to help yourself. Your mind and body close down, and doing the simplest tasks like getting out of bed or drawing the curtains seem unsurmountable. Taking small steps gives you a way to dig yourself out of the pit of depression.
The first step is to stop thinking for a moment, clear your mind of any thoughts and then put one hundred per cent of your focus on the next step of getting out of bed and standing up. Nothing more, just do that. When you are standing, take a few deep breaths and take a moment to clear your mind again before opening your bedroom door. Again stop and take deep breaths knowing that you have taken the first steps towards feeling better. Next, go downstairs and get a cup of tea. Don't think about it; just do it. You have taken only four small steps, but you are already functioning again and have injected momentum into your situation.
Next, open the front door and step outside with your cup of tea in your hand, breathe the fresh air and just observe what is happening in the street or garden in front of you. Not only are you starting to function, but you are also engaging and interacting with your environment again. Little steps have taken you a long way without your mind realising, becoming overwhelmed and closing you down. I know it is exhausting, but just keep doing one thing at a time until you start functioning normally again. The only important thing is to keep up the momentum of taking little steps and not be tempted to stop. With depression, big strides are just not feasible, so only little steps can work. Next time you feel really down, give the Small Steps Technique a try.
Anxiety - By anxiety, I mean when I get worried, stressed or scared about something I have to do or a situation I am in. For me, it describes a feeling of unease which can range in its intensity from being a mild distraction to having a full-on panic attack. It can make me irritable, increase my restlessness and make sleeping difficult.
The first step is to try and identify what is bothering you. Take a piece of paper and draw a line down the middle to create two columns. In the left column, jot down everything that is making you anxious. It could be a task you have to do, somewhere you have to go or a deeper-rooted worry you have about money or relationships. Whatever it is doesn't matter; just write it down.
Simply listing your problems and anxieties can be cathartic in itself, as seeing them in black and white makes them less daunting. Next, try to rank your anxieties by intensity, and when you have numbered them, start at the first and follow the next step. Go to the right-hand column and write down what you can do to address the anxiety or problem listed. Don't try to analyse why it makes you anxious; just focus on finding a viable solution. For example, if you are worried about an upcoming exam, stop running away from it and draw up a revision plan which is broken down into small achievable chunks.
The simple act of writing down a plan means that you have taken back control of the situation and that your destiny is back in your hands. Self-empowerment is, in my experience, one of the best antidotes for anxiety. A simple list of your anxieties with an arrow linking to a solution makes everything seem manageable and within your control again and provides a very powerful tool to burst an anxiety bubble.
Procrastination - One of the most frustrating side effects of my ADHD is that I procrastinate. In other words, my brain finds every imaginable reason not to do something. I put off paying bills, booking appointments, writing course work and clearing up.
It is like I become mentally stuck in the mud and I can't do what I need to do. The longer I leave it, the more daunting the task becomes, and my brain seems to find increasingly good reasons not to do it.
Literally, picking up a pair of socks from the floor can take on the same significance as going for a job interview. It's crazy, but that's the power ADHD holds over you. Again this is when I revert to using the Small Steps Technique. First, I write down on my phone a single task that I need to do and set a time when I'm going to do it, say in half an hour. I don't know why, but my mind needs to build up to things. Next, I break the task down into little steps. If it is paying a bill, then step one will be to open the envelope, which is often the hardest step. Step two is to open my banking App, and step three is to pay it immediately. The final step is to reward myself for having completed the task.
When I read this back, it sounds pathetic that paying a bill can be so difficult, but the reality of my world with ADHD is that even the simplest of tasks can seem impossible. However, the more I come to terms with the reality of my situation and accept that I need to use tools like the Small Steps Technique, the better my mindset becomes and the more I achieve.
Lastly, It is impossible for those without ADHD to fully understand how debilitating depression, anxiety and procrastination can be. I have decided to fight these symptoms, but I am sufficiently aware that mental strength is not enough as they are too powerful and that clever tools and techniques have to be employed to outsmart them. I hope that this proves as useful for you as it has been for me. Let me know how you get on.
Tom