Welcome to my personal stories and advice on my struggles with ADHD/Anxiety.
My name is Tom McCormick, I am 20 years old and I have had a very privileged life. I went to great schools and always have had great friends and family.
So why did I struggle at school? I ‘misbehaved’ and I was always the one getting in trouble, while being in the bottom sets for everything.
I always wanted to do well but never could bring myself to do any work or focus like my peers. It made me feel guilty and I would beat myself up over it everyday.
Then I was diagnosed at age 16 with ADHD, at that time I had hit rock bottom and was heavily depressed having moved away to a new school and starting a new journey which now I look back on I wasn’t ready for... I was taking Beta Blockers for my depression and Ritalin for my ADHD, I stopped taking them after a while as I found myself throwing up every morning I took them and felt like I wasn't myself, I became quiet and felt empty while taking these. I was lost at this time and felt like a feather in the wind of life.
When it came to Exam grade predictions I used to fail my mocks and was predicted really low grades. But somehow was always able to pull it out the bag through a skill I now learnt is ‘Hyperfocus.’ The way I could describe HyperFocus from my personal experience, is just feeling that your brain is working at 100mph and you are in your own little bubble and when my back was against the wall and everyone else would crumble that's when I would shine.
It sounds like a super power and in some regards it is. For years I would mentally beat myself up that I was different to everyone else and would focus all my energy in sport as a way to escape from reality. When really I have now found I have a gift that the other students in my class did not have in being able to HyperFocus on a task.
Now I am sitting here awaiting graduating university and I have learnt so much about myself in the last year, I am excited to share what has worked and hasn’t worked for me. I am not a scientist, I don’t have a degree in mental health studies, I am just an average Joe who has been trying to master his own mind over the past year to be able to take control of my ADHD and Anxiety and use it as a positive rather than a negative.
I felt let down by secondary school now I look back at it as I was always portrayed as the kid who misbehaved and didn’t take it serious nor care. But in fact that wasn’t the case I tried so hard but I just needed a bit of a push and guidance to figure out how to become the best version of myself I could be.
I know there is some young kid sitting out there who is thinking what I was thinking a few years back, ‘Man I suck at school, while also thinking about what you wanted to eat for dinner and are going to watch on Netflix later all at the same time.’ To that kid out there, I feel you, it’s sh*t but you just have to get on with it. You have to figure out what works for you and not what works for others.
As soon as you are able to take control of your own mind with ADHD and Anxiety and find something you love to do, the world is your oyster. There’s a reason why some of the most successful people in the world e.g Richard Branson, Bill Gates to name a few have ADHD. The reason for that is simple, they have taken time to understand their minds and capitalised on that.
If I could talk to myself 5 years ago, this is what I would say to 16 year old me:
1. Stop beating yourself up over something you can’t control and start looking at what you can, control the controllables in your life.
2. Don't be afraid to be selfish sometimes, if you need time alone or to go home to reset then do it.
3. Stop running from your problems, don't be afraid to be in your mind. Find the root cause and work on it everyday. When you start doing things you don't want to do your resilience to stress becomes stronger and life will get a little easier each time.
4. Switch off your phone and be present, life is a lot more enjoyable that way.
5. Sleep and routine are non-negotiable. Wake up to natural light and have a set time you sleep, stop staying up until 3am scrolling needlessly through Instagram.
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